Anna Nichole Smith: solving the mystery of her death
Differential diagnosis of sudden death in 39 year-old person is fairly limited (but look for Hollywood, Florida CSI to come up with, “Indeterminate.”) Considerations include heart (primary disturbance of heartbeat or myocardial infarction), blood vessels (blood clot to lungs or brain, rupture of blood vessel), or toxic (drugs or alcohol or drugs and alcohol). Leading cause of death in the “indeterminate” category is “The Cosmic Flyswatter.”
Why our obsession with Vickie Lynn Hogan (aka “Anna Nichole Smith”)? Was it her brains, artistic creativity, tireless work in solving the plight of the downtrodden, taste in clothing, social activism, political brilliance, efforts as a nutritional role model, or dedication saving William Jefferson Clinton from the deep dark pit of lechery and wankerhood? Nope, none of that, although the last possibility certainly has its own form of merit. Vickie Lynn Anna Nichole’s talent was exuding the very weird, hideously hyperbolic macromastic, image of womanhood, thus sending a monumental negative nebulistic message to women of realistic proportions (i.e. those in the 95% of the bell-shaped curve–oh god, was that an ODDpun?), and at the same time providing a two dimensional sexual aid to men. Distortion caries a heavy burden.
All this brings us to a few ODDthoughts. Forget all the theistic differences between Muslims and the Western world. One likes their women covered up, the other with their clothes off. Different method, same message. Here’s another thoughts for the day. Follow closely now. Anna Vickie Nichole Lynn recently had a baby, the father of whom is up for debate. The Prophet Abu al-Qasim Muhammad married his second (or possibly third) wife Ayescha when she was six years old (although he waited until he considered her to be a proper age before consummating the marriage–Ayescha was nine when the Prophet did the deed.) Hold on, don’t go P.C. quite yet. Most would say bedding a nine-year old is a reasonable candidate for the type of behavior that got John Mark Karr into a whole lot of trouble, a business class ticket to Boulder, Colorado and a lot of press re. the Jon Benet Ramsey case.
Okay, time for an interim summary. Death, sex, children, and…
everyone thus far associated with this story seems to have three names. But wait, there’s more… Prince Frederic Von Halt claims he’s the father of Anna Lynn Hogan’s child, Dinnelynn (that’s two names in our ODDbook). And to whom is the good Prince married? Ah hah–Zsa Zsa Gabor! The way we see it, we need a crack investigator brought in on the Anna Nichole Smith case, one with a sterling history of solving tough problems related to death, small children, and pediophiles. We ODDones say, bring in the Boulder, Colorado District Attorney, MARY LACY KEENAN!
~~The ODDones for OurDailyDead.com
Technorati tags: CSI, Vickie Lynn Hogan, Anna Nichole Smith, Abu al-Qasim Muhammad, Ayescha, John Mark Karr, Boulder, Jon Benet, Frederic Von Halt, Dinnelynn, Zsa Zsa Gabor, MARY LACY KEENAN
February 13th, 2007 at 12:46 pm
I love the Cosmic Flyswatter theory, mostly the name. You are hilarious. Your comparison (One likes their women covered up, the other with their clothes off. Different method, same message.) between the middle and western worlds is stunningly accurate. The whole second paragraph made me laugh out loud several times. Thanks for that.
February 17th, 2007 at 8:03 am
According to the State Laws of Texas, Anna’s mother should at the very least be under investigation by CPS and Law Enforcement for her claimed criminal acts against Anna as a child. See definitions listed below for Child Abuse. Because her mother was a police officer, her awareness of the law makes this even worse, in my opinion. Further, those around Anna had to know something was going on, they to can be prosecuted for the failure to protect Anna from her mother.
We are all talking about HKS. Let’s talk about the criminal acts of her mother. These acts caused great emotional harm that had a deadly cause and effect to Anna. In a sense, her mother killed her, it just took 39 years to accomplish her goal.
http://www.dfps.state.tx.us/child_protection/about_child_protective_services/
FAMILY CODE
SUBTITLE E. PROTECTION OF THE CHILD
CHAPTER 261. INVESTIGATION OF REPORT OF CHILD ABUSE OR NEGLECT
SUBCHAPTER A. GENERAL PROVISIONS
§ 261.001. DEFINITIONS. In this chapter:
(1) “Abuse” includes the following acts or omissions
by a person:
(A) mental or emotional injury to a child that
results in an observable and material impairment in the child’s
growth, development, or psychological functioning;
(B) causing or permitting the child to be in a
situation in which the child sustains a mental or emotional injury
that results in an observable and material impairment in the
child’s growth, development, or psychological functioning;
(C) physical injury that results in substantial
harm to the child, or the genuine threat of substantial harm from
physical injury to the child, including an injury that is at
variance with the history or explanation given and excluding an
accident or reasonable discipline by a parent, guardian, or
managing or possessory conservator that does not expose the child
to a substantial risk of harm;
(D) failure to make a reasonable effort to
prevent an action by another person that results in physical injury
that results in substantial harm to the child;
April 11th, 2007 at 12:07 pm
Does the fact that both mother and son died in the same manner, with the same person present (Howard Stern), in a matter of months apart, three days after the child Stern swears is his was born the son “heir to Anna fortune” dies from drugs that are not readily available ring an alarm with anyone? Stearn claimed the child was his, any man with half a mind knows if he is the father of a unborn or recently born child.
Why would Stern try to block the DNA results? Because it’s the only thing that stands between him and millions of dollars. He knew damn well the child was not his.
It sure is circumstantial that Howard went from lawyer, to executer of the estate, to lover and to father of the only heir to a fortune.
May 30th, 2007 at 6:08 am
she’s a whore